Every woman wants to feel like they are a part of something or value to someone.
There is no way we can deny it, WE ALL DO, INCLUDING MYSELF!
We do things for the attention desire. We dress the way we expect to get attention.
We do our hair the way we expect the world to accept it. We value ourselves to what people see, think, & believe about us.
Whether we want to accept our actions or not, WE DO!
CAN I BE TRANSPARENT TODAY?
Back in jr. high /sr. high we had something called MySpace ( yes I took it wayyyy back). This is where my insecurities and pleasing people began to plant itself and bloom. I would spend like an hour trying to get the RIGHT picture from the RIGHT angle with the RIGHT background and the RIGHT filter.. YES, I put that much into it. All of that just so some guy would find me sexy or cute or some chick would look at me an envy me as beautiful. THAT'S JUST BEING REAL! I began to overly-value people & their opinions, unknowingly digging myself deeper into a hole of living for man's approval. Outside of MySpace, I had to have the best hairstyle, I had to be "talking" or dating one of the hottest athletes in school, and have the most popular friends. All those things I HAD to have & when I couldn't get them my heart was crushed & I felt WORTHLESS.
All of these things carried over into my freshman year of college
where I became addicted to prescription pain killers to help numb my pains of rejection over and over.
I eventually overdosed and attempted suicide on March 11,2012
THIS WAS MY ROCK BOTTOM.
What started off as harmless fun put me in people bondage & battling depression
& I felt my only way out was to DIE.
BUT JUST LIKE YOU....... GOD said no. I'm not done with you.
By federal mandate, patients who attempt suicide are sent to a mental institution for 72 hours for observation. I laid on my bed in that hospital, crying, heart crushed, ( STILL THINKING ABOUT WHAT THEY WERE SAYING BACK HOME), This moment is where I heard the still, audible voice of God say " From this point, there is freedom". At 3AM on March 12,2012 I accepted Jesus as my Lord and Savior and told Him he can have it ALL. My heart, my mind, my dreams, my life.
I write this because a burden has been placed on my heart for my sisters.
When I look our in this world, I see women who desire likes and friends on social media than the presence of their Father.
I see women who paint a happy face of makeup & cry themselves to sleep when the mask comes off and reality sets in.
I see women who desire something greater than they have been exposed too.
THEN.............. I see women who can be healed & made whole by the power of God in their lives.
I see women who know the importance of inner beauty and see themselves as beautiful by GOD's standards.
I see women living for God and not man. I see women who know they are QUEENS.
So today I say lets talk fashion and budgeting later, today I say lets address the root. Lets dig deep, find the root & LET IT GO. Isaiah 2:22 : Don't put your trust in mere humans, They are as frail as breath. What good are they? .NO DEEP QUOTES JUST THE WORD. Today make let GOD reign in your hearts and live to make Him SMILE. That's all that matters. The omnipresent, omnipotent, supreme ruler who holds the UNIVERSE and best yet, YOUR CREATOR and FATHER's opinion ONLY matters.
BE FREE.
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